Twerk

Twerk

Evidently BMW stands for Bat Mobile Wicked!

Evidently BMW stands for Bat Mobile Wicked!

aaliyah1979-2001:

Aries: stop jackin off
Taurus: hoe and not ashamed of it
Gemini: fake
Cancer: crybaby ass
Leo: BIG Bitch and u fuckin kno it. u love it dont u.
Virgo: ethereal and always SO busy
Libra: basic
Scorpio: u are sleepy and powerful.
Sagittarius: probably like drinkin some healthy shit. u look good as hell too.
Capricorn: bitter
Aquarius: clean ur fingernails
Pisces: stop bein so stingy an love urself

HORROR-SCOPES: Even these are true. I am basic.

My pathetic submission to the New Yorker caption contest

My pathetic submission to the New Yorker caption contest

beautyyytime:

Why one eyebrow always comin out Gucci and the other eyebrow comin out Walmart

Hahaha

I MADE JOKES ABOUT IMPEACHING OBAMA YEARS AGO

http://t.co/Mm6dSZWNVm and http://t.co/ByarbX1nBo I imPREACH about #ImpeachObama

DRAW A CARICATURE OF ME AND SUBMIT

Please?!

Aside from predicting the 2008 Wall Street fuck-up, predicting a cheese sandwich being called the MeltDown, among many other prognostications, Carlin was the original inventor of The Purge.
Actually, the film franchise is just a combination of “A Clockwork Orange”, horror film “The Strangers”, and the game BioShock.

But here (in full) is Carlin’s original satirical proposal from his book “Brain Droppings”

Evidently I was always trying to give speeches even when it was uncalled for and I wasn’t invited