dion-thesocialist:

White folks on tumblr be like, “Please be kind to moths. They are doing their best and deserve respect and kindness. Never step on a flower because they are sensitive and have feelings. Also, why can’t I say the n word?”

socialpsychopathblr:

Louis Le Breton was a French painter who specialised in marine paintings. He executed illustrations of occult demons, working from engravings by M. Jarrault, for the 1863 edition of “Dictionnaire Infernal” by Collin de Plancy.

dexbonus:

magical-ginger:

image

image

trying to laugh quietly while Sam is livestreaming next to me but fuck look at that cup bunny

I, A COMEDIAN, REVIEW DANE COOK’S NEW SPECIAL

Lemme just say I understand taste is such a personal thing and my opinions are as valid as anyone’s. I don’t wanna come off as one of those millions of online Dane Cook haters. Though he really does have this demeanor that is a real turn off. There’s something about him that comes off as sneaky, egomaniacal, dishonest. Plus his speaking voice and the way he looks I feel hurts the material. If you had someone else up there delivering that same act, it’d be a little better. I can’t put my finger on it.
Okay, anyway…

Not a fan of the cliche red curtain behind him.

He dressed a little too causal, as always.

Too many shaky shots.

Too many angles got out of focus.

Basically his opening bit was about the annoyance of waiting in line, which is so hack by now.

I’ve also wondered why the shit emoji has eyes. But his “did they have a meeting?” take on it has been done so many times by comedians wondering how something weird got made.

I like his interaction with the audience, waking people up a little, making them aware and in the moment.

"Epiphany moment" is redundant.

He’s too good looking in a douchebag way to be a truly great comic. There’s something about the gym goer look that doesn’t do well in the long run.

He’s too full of himself and it’s sickening when he says “I know, clap. That shit was funny. Laugh.” He just kept saying “Of course you laughed, that’s you!”

Used the old Seinfeld line of comparing a date to a job interview!

Satan’s asshole is his ChristianMingle username…Other comedians have said “satan’s asshole” before, including himself.

"I know, funny. That’s why I brought it." Ugh.

The text argument, emoji, and girl Twitter profile jokes were good.

Good use of puns

His t-shirt says Relax. I dunno if that’s good or not.

Of course he did the obvious thing of comparing emojis to Hieroglyphics.

Also another thing I thought of was how you always look when you shit. I’m glad he did that bit cuz I literally thought of the same thing and now i don’t have to do the joke.

I’ve been comparing vaginas to the Sarlaac put from Return of the Jedi forever and now he did it. And the idea of putting a firecracker in a vagina.

His bit about violating each other’s digital privacy in a relationship was great.

He does too much relationship comedy.

I knew he’d say “didn’t even share the profits with you” about the meth lab line.

I hate how he keeps acting out the audience referring to him. He says his own name too much.

Love how he figured out how to find out the persons code by wiping it totally clean, tricking them into unlocking, then finding their code by emitting breath fog onto the screen to see the smudges. Then it’s just a few good guesses at the combination order and you’re in. But us gotta trick them to leave beforehand.

The mutual breakup wish has been done before. Again, Seinfeld.

We get it, Dane: Men and women are different!

I liked when he laid on the stage making little rhythms, taps, and songs.

The kidnapped line was great.

He reused his line about being depressed to the point of having one lightbulb left and bringing it to the room you need. But it was good.

Great joke on porn categories

He obviously just kept saying “shit bum” cuz he hopes it will catch on.

I was wondering when a comic would do a line about a girl gagging and puking on a cock. I’ve been waiting for years and didn’t wanna do a joke about it myself cuz it’s not quite my style. Glad someone finally brought it up. Heh, “brought it up”.

He also re-used his line to a couple in the crowd “How long have you two been about to break up?”

The dedication to Robin Williams was nice.

The end credits music is not my cup of tea.

I give this special a C- but maybe I’m too harsh a critic.

Just a little lighthearted racism

Just a little lighthearted racism

Forgot I made this back in 2009.

Forgot I made this back in 2009.

Yes!

Yes!

THE BAE…

THE BAE…